A World Without Color

I live in a cell

of black and white,

no difference of day,

no difference of night.

My life is breathless,

a grasp held tight,

but I know something

of this is not right.

I have no sense

of red, yellow, blue;

I have no expression

because of you.

I have no joy

in rainbows and sun,

who's life should be

for everyone;

not just for the ones who've done well,

but also for the curious, the love they will sell,

only to see their beautiful world,

with color; just when will that unfurl?

I live in a cell,

of plain repetition,

of the same old verses

from the same superstition.

I have a right

to wonder and quote

without your beliefs 

shoved down my throat.

I'm only so young, 

so please understand

that I'm only trying to withstand

the many things you tell me so,

but now it's time I let them go.

My life is a dream

you've crushed with your feet;

a weight on my shoulders

you've given me.

I only ask

that you understand 

my world without color,

is a beach without sand;

it's empty and water based soul can't compare

to the thought of you showing how much you don't care.

I'm sorry I won't be what you desire,

and I'm sorry I can't fulfill your desire

of what a person of your standards be,

but the way you are, this person won't be me.

Your expressionless ways of the word of the Lord,

your life is as stale as an unpainted board.

You say you love He who has given you life,

but how does He forgive you for my unending strife?

You put me through Hell, and I tell you this:

I will my life to expressional bliss;

let me become the radiant colors

of the world, instead of these colors, duller.

Let me become the drawings on walls

so maybe you'll see it after all;

your expressionless world traps me inside,

and I've nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.

LJ

20 October, 2013

...for my best friend, Rebecca, who's story inspired this poem.