I Often Wonder

I often wonder what I did wrong.
Was it not that I cared for you enough?
Was it something I could not control?
Was it my innocent nature and desire for kindness,
even if I understand this cruel world like the palm of my hand?
Was I a shadow that lingered behind you?
Was I just a figment that was never realized nor understood?

I often wonder, because I feel so meek
in the hands of My Creator.
When I come to,
I often wonder what fate lies in store for me.
Does everything disappear when I am to leave
the cold, familiar, yet unfamiliar grasp of this world?
Maybe one day,
I won't have to often wonder what I did wrong,
but I can wonder how I can do better...
for you, for my world,
for myself.

I often wonder, because I feel so nervous
in the embrace of my angel.
I often wonder what my angel would say to me.
Does everything breathe when I am to enter
the cool, yet warm grasp of Heaven's air?
Maybe one day,
I won't have to wonder what I will hear,
but I can wonder what I will say to Christ...
for you, my world,
for myself.

I often wonder what is right to do.
Is it right to care enough?
Is it right to control what I can not?
Is it right to have my innocence, and my desire for kindness,
even if it's true that I know this cruel world like the palm of my hand?
Is it right to be a shadow that lingers behind,
or to be a shadow that becomes your friend?
Was it right to be a figment of your imagination,
or was it right to be the shadow that loved you so?
Was it right for me to be realized and understood?

I think...
I think I don't have to wonder often 

as much as I think I do,
because the answer is right in front of me.

-LJ

6 October 2014

Your Voice In My Head

To Michael: 

Your voice in my head is a beautiful thing. 

 I hear you laugh, I hear you sing; 

 it calms the storms of anger's might,

 and lulls me sound asleep at night.

 Your voice in my head is wisdom to me. 

It makes me think, sets my mind free; 

 It beautifies the best in life, 

and releases love without a strife. 

Your voice in my head is a comfort of love. 

 It's a blessed and spiritual gift from above;

 It stops the flood of tears I cry,

 and lifts my happiness to the sky. 

Your voice in my head is childlike at most,

 a mystical door to open, not close; 

it lets my imagination free, 

where the place in my heart beckons me. 

 Your voice inside my head.... 

makes me smile. 

 Every single 

'once in a while';

 So, thank you for a love so pure,

 I love your voice and that's for sure. 

11 August 2013

 -LJ

Lost In A Rage

I am lost in a rage;
The earth turns dark.
The world stands still.
Lightning cracks, and
rain petrifies all movement.
In my footsteps,
earthquakes awaken
those unaware
of my anger,
and startle the living
from the sky above,
to world below;
to Mother Earth,
and Father Time.
In rage,
I drew strength
from energy
far too powerful
and,
in my possession,
disdained.
Was I the beast that unlocked the fear
of this frightened world I came to love?
...then the skies opened wide.

 ©LJ

6 October 2014